Part One: “My Ride or Die.”
It was around 2012, and I was still using a lot of drugs, I was tweaking and using alcohol with pills, gang banging, and all of that, but I knew something in my life needed to change. Although I wasn’t ready to let go of that gang banging mentality, I wouldn’t deliberately go out and seek it, unless it came knocking on my door. I was driving down the street one day, and seen Concorde Career College in North Hollywood. I wandered in and enrolled into the Medical Assistant program. It was a 9-10 month program, but due to the lifestyle I was living, I ended up getting arrested and was eventually released on bail. I had turned a nine-month program into a two-year program.
It was the end of 2013 or beginning of 2014 when I met Briana at Concorde Career college. I remember walking into class on the first day and sitting towards the back of the room where Briana was sitting, and grabbing a seat next to her. I didn't come prepared for school, and I had no paper or pen and asked someone in the front for some. I remember this random girl popped out of nowhere and said, “Here you go, anything you need, just let me know, I got you.” I could see Briana in my peripheral vision, and she was like “Damn, alright-so you got it like that,” and I said something like, “yeah, of course I got it like that, this is my moneymaker.” It’s easy to connect with people through laughter and if you can make someone laugh it establishes a relationship and that was the easiest way to connect with her. Right off the bat, I intuitively knew she was different from all the other girls I’ve ever met. She intrigued me, and I wanted to pursue her further.
One day, I asked her if I could tag along and walk her home since we were heading in the same direction. During that walk, we had the most profound conversation, and it really showed me the layers and depth to her. We talked about goals, life and everything in between. She pointed out my tattoos and knew I was a gang member and asked me why I was in school and I told her that I needed change. I wanted a family of my own one day, children that I could raise and give them all the things I never had. I wanted a woman in my life that I could wake up next to every morning and share that love and connection with. I’m very finicky and picky when it comes to women because of my mom, but this woman, Briana, was it for me. We started hanging out more, and I saw the value in her, and I was persistent until she finally told me she wanted to take things a step further and date. We dated for seven months before I ended up getting locked up again.
I was arrested in October 2014 for two counts of kidnapping to commit armed robbery and a total of six counts of armed robbery with gang and gun enhancements. Briana was arrested as my alleged accomplice and faced identical charges, carrying a maximum of 88 years to life in prison. This was her first real encounter with the law and her first time being arrested. She was never associated with the gang lifestyle that I was living in, yet she suffered collateral damage because she loved me and because she was my lady. The pigs viewed her as my apparent weakness and attempted to exploit it by trying to use her against me as leverage to roll over on me.
I remember that day vividly, sitting in the back of the LAPD control car handcuffed, with Briana next to me. I remember looking into her eyes and seeing fear, but this was a different type of fear – a fear of losing someone you love. I reassured her, “There’s nothing to worry about, they want me, not you, and I'm gonna make sure you go home with nothing on your record.” I didn't want to say too much because the police often use your emotions against you, hoping to provoke you into saying something incriminating while they have audio and visual recording devices in their control cars.
Briana looked at me, and I’m paraphrasing, but she said: “Fuck that. Don’t give up. Don’t sacrifice yourself just so I can go home. I love you Alex, and we'll fight this together, and if we have to, we'll go all the way to trial.” As I mentioned before, I knew this woman was different from all the others that I had been with. Briana was my ride or die, and as I mentioned before, I put her through hell and back, yet she passed with flying colors. She is as rare as a rose that grows from concrete. As rare as she was to me, I was not going to allow my actions or the system to railroad an incontrovertible innocent person.
For the next three months, she was incarcerated at the female facility; Lynnwood County Jail, going back and forth to court. The only time I was able to communicate with her in person was coming from court on the county bus. I took that time to comfort her and put her up on game. On one of the bus rides back from court, she told me about an unexpected visit from two detectives, claiming that I was allegedly involved in a homicide and attempted to procure information from her under the pretense of a visit from her attorney. By then, she developed a low-key hatred towards cops because they tried to use her as a gambit in a game of chess against me, even though they knew she was completely innocent. So she politely told them to “fuck off”, and returned to her cell. I remember my lawyers asking me how I would like to proceed with my case, and I would refuse to answer any questions, unless Briana was released with nothing on her record. It became a waiting game, and eventually, after three months of being locked up and the state not having one shred of evidence against her, she was released, and all charges dismissed.
Only then did my heart find ease and the pain alleviated. I know I fucked up in the past, and I’m currently paying my debts to society by pursuing an education and furthering my knowledge so I can properly rehabilitate myself and hopefully return to society as a law-abiding citizen. This drastic change in my life is all in the name of love, and trust me, I owe it to Briana. She saw good in me even when I was incapable of seeing it in myself. Love is blind and love is authentic, even for a man sentenced to reparations.
Briana’s love, trust and loyalty on her own volition by choosing to be my ride or die, and to ride it out with me was the ultimate cruicible in the name of love.